I was having a chatting with a friend of mine a few moments ago, and for some reason I said the following few lines…which I thought I should post on the blog:
blog.akef.org says:
you know…sometimes i’ve the feeling that society over complicates the whole marriage issue
blog.akef.org says:
ya3ni i know that el 3adat and taqaleed (customs and norms) are important to society…but the feeling i’ve is that sometimes too many of them become obstacles to the whole process of marriage
This raises a bigger question, what is society all about? The feeling I’ve is that a part of what society is, is dictating what the norms are…which are important I guess…but at the end of the day sometimes taken too far such that they over complicate life. Why do things have to be complicated? I sometimes feel that as society “advances” (yes I put quotes), things get more complicated. This applies to society, technology, etc.
So are we truly advancing? Or just over complicating things and think we are better off?
Cheers!
Akef
Yeah i think sometimes society complicates the marriage concept. the idea is to follow the norms you believe are logical, not any norm society dictates. these norms come and go based on the trends of the time, but only the well established proper ones stay.
Well, I totally agree that society over complicates the marriage issue. These customs and norms where developed through the course of tens of years and though life and economic conditions has changed dramatically over the past couple of decades but the customs and norms haven’t really changed much since 4 or 5 decades ago. Nevertheless there is a few open minded people who understand the realities of today’s world and willing to adjust but these are just a handful of people who does not really represent society.
A while before reading your posts I was talking with my colleagues. One of my colleagues said that she met some friends who were talking about their daughter-in-law’s wedding dress which cost them LE55,000 and stated that that’s the norm nowadays and the dress couldn’t have possibly been cheaper.
I thought to myself, people decided that “the dress couldn’t have been cheaper, the apartment couldn’t have been cheaper, the honeymoon…, the shabka…, the mahr…, the…, the…, the… I have no idea what the society will decide is the norm in a year or two. When people say that that amount of money is the value of their daughter and that the groom and his family should pay the max to prove their appreciation for her!!! then people should simply sell their daughters in slave markets but search for a more trendy name for that market.
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